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| VERBAL ABUSE IS STILL ABUSE. Which is why I like it so much. |
"Words can hurt and words can heal. What have yours done today?" It makes you think doesn't it? Yeah, seriously. What sort of fairy is healing people with their words? If I knew that my words were capable of ringing the necks of small, helpless, dewy-eyed children, then I would never shut up. So in celebration of mean-spirited remarks, and even more specifically, the remarks of mine that have hurt many a reader's butt, I thought I'd do something special today and prepare an article that collects some of my favorite recent comments from some of the falsest wannabe poseurs who are too frail to handle the true metal glory of my web blog.
"It's pathectic how you keep bashing bands that you feel isn't "metal" but don't provide any worthwhile arguments.. you bitch and ramble on about a band with petty insults. i wouldn't be surprised if you're some adolescent twat who grew up listening to thrash and think kerry king is god, or just some outcast loser that hates the world. Do you even have any music background? You're no elitist, just some closed minded hatemonger. Dissing Trivium, BFMV, BvB, etc... dude these guys are headlining festivals.. hell i bet their fingers alone have gotten more pussy than you. jealous? what are you doing with your life faggot?" - Umadpussy
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| "umadpussy" pictured here having a conversation with Matt Heafy about where those fingers have been. |
So let's take a look at some of your "worthwhile arguments": I don't get any pussy and I don't have a life. Very clever. Do you still consider female company to be something that's difficult to obtain? Do you think it a glorious feat worth bragging about because you know what a vagina feels like? How very internet of you. You speak of sex like it is a perk reserved only for your favorite rock stars, and I've never had it, nor am I capable of obtaining it, because I don't play chirpy buttcore riffs. Trust me, I am eternally proud that you finally convinced some fatty at some point to open her skin-enfolded, gaping she-maw for you, if that is where you're coming from in all this. That's great. However, I am in fact over the age of 15, and am no longer so hormonally imbalanced that I put having sexual intercourse up on the pedestal with the cool kids. You'll get there someday.
So I'm either an adolescent twat who grew up listening to thrash, or I'm some outcast loser that hates the world? I really have to be one of those two things? Your former theory completely baffles me, because the fact of the matter is, I couldn't have "grown up" doing anything if I was still an "adolescent". I'm pretty sure adolescents are still growing up, shit for brains. So I'll help you out with an argument against me you can't even make on your own, because I'm just that generous: yes, I am a twat who grew up listening to thrash metal. You nailed it. Sounds pretty fucking metal to me. You're still an adolescent, still growing up listening to BVB and Trivium. I think my readers will come to conclusion quickly enough that I am a better twat than you and I always was. As for a musical background, that's really cool that you rock out on your Gio Ibanez in your bedroom with your 10W Peavey, so it makes you think you know what you're talking about in regards to good music. It's hard, really hard to concentrate and play the BFMV tabs. I played guitar, drums, and bass before, so I get it. That's why you think they're still a cool band, because you're a teenager and still base your musical opinion on difficulty ratings of guitar tablature. Go drink Drano.
Hey faggot, look at InfidelAmsterdam on youtube. He's obviously a metalhead. He has tons of merch and metal decorations around his apartment, a metal gf and goes to tons of different metal shows and concerts. He's metal and he's definitely not in poverty. If you say he's not metal then you're just an idiot because even Brenocide has featured and/or referenced him on this site multiple times. - AnthraxFan
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| Fostex Garments Jacket: $50. Kataklysm shirt: $20. Metal chain: $25 Being the wealthiest man in metal apparently: priceless. |
Tony Iommi lives in a fucking mansion and your best example of a non-impoverished metalhead is InfidelAmsterdam? Having a girlfriend + going to concerts + owning t-shirts = rich. Infidel puts up drywall for a living, friend. Not exactly a life of glitz and glamor. However, if you had a job like that, you would know that t-shirts and things are actually fairly affordable with a budget in mind. Fear not Anthraxfan, there is life after allowance.
Edit: Chill the fuck out, I'm cool with Infidel. He'll tell you he's not loaded if you ask him.
I knew you you're self were a poseur when i saw this page, and now i see this bullshit about this lame ass band. Good to know theres people advocating "pretty awesome metal" like this.
-Speaker
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| B is for BUTTHURT. |
Wow, I never considered that "I I are self" were such a poseur. Thanks for the input, Speaker. How's your blog going? Looks like you picked a random black and white template and started writing how much people eating meat makes your butt hurt so bad. You'll be the next fucking Metal Sucks in no time with writing skills such as yours. I'll also have you know that thinking of the cow's retarded fucking face before it got impaled with a hydraulic spike, makes me way more hungry than just thinking about steak on it's own. Sorry, but a guy who get's a boner about animal feelings has no right to talk to me about being metal. Go listen to Aerosmith and think you know what you're talking about. Why don't you guys go pay Speaker's blog a visit using the link above, and grant him the only hits he will ever get.
dude your a fucking twat... this band [Chelsea Grin] is actually going somewhere while your sitting in your chair with a finger in your ass thinking of pointless shit to write on this "Thats not Metal" website... lol its funny cause if you had something productive to do with your life you wouldnt be spending in it talking shit about bands... lol how about when your playing in a band thats signed come back and talk shit lol the Alex is living his dream while your talking shit online... lol and chances are you dont have a job or a life for that matter, so how about when you also get both of those as well you come talk shit faggot. - Anonymous
P.S, Alex is a fucking amazing vocalist!!
No he isn't... LOL...
Enjoy your weekend fellas. New reviews will be up next week and a new Violation is in the works. Stay tuned and try to stay metal.
- Brenocide \,,/
We'll see who's lolling in a couple short years when the '-core' trend dies completely and all these guys are left with sleeves of meaningless tattoos, hopelessly stretched and irreparable earlobes,countless caribiner keychains, and nothing really of substance to redeem it all...I predict mass suicides.
ReplyDeleteI think what that Anthraxfan guy was trying to say is that Infidelamsterdam isn't living in poverty, poverty would be eating instant soups and meatless kraft dinner every night and living in some 1 room shithole apartment. Also, wall plastering in Amsterdam pays a lot more than you would think, especially because you can do custom jobs for people and just pocket all the money for yourself like a plumber.Mattassacre's post just made being a metalhead sound like you had to eat and sleep in a soup kitchen.
ReplyDeleteI love being able to see inside that guy's nasal cavity.
ReplyDeleteFucking hell at that last picture. Who needs a pasta strainer when you can just put it in that dudes head and drain the water out.
ReplyDeleteAlso, what is this world coming too when people don't fucking get satire? It's not there to be put up for debate or to get sand in the vagina about. It's supposed to be funny. How insecure do you have to be to actually get offended at something posted on the internet that is not directed at you? And if it does apply to you, so what?
You really hurt my feelings Brenocide. Oh well, I was featured on some shitty blog for all the losers around the world to see. Thanks for the moment in the spotlight, even if the spotlight you provide isn't very big. At all. Also, thanks for completely missing my point. Infidel obviously isn't rich but he's not fucking impoverished either you dumb shit. Cyanide gets it, too bad he's a cunt too.
ReplyDeleteHey now, you're talking about the biggest spotlight you're ever gonna be in. I would ham it up if I were you.
ReplyDeleteDid I mention that I'm a huge polesucker and like to suck pole?
ReplyDeleteButthurt, asspained, anally-frustrated, rectally riddled, colon inflamation, 10 000 dicks in their asses, etc...
ReplyDeleteIt's true, I am a butthurt poser. I've been living in this soup kitchen and the pure metal-ness of it all is just too much for me.
ReplyDeleteAmazing how all these little bitches always end up degenerating into "your a fagget!!!!1" type comments.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous sounds like a fucking rocket scientist.
ReplyDeletehow fuckin dense are you? just because i defend trivium, bfmv, bvb doesn't mean it consists of my music library. do you appreciate the works of allan holdsworth? how about andres segovia? you probably haven't even heard of them, so next time don't assume a bfmv fan can't appreciate and respect more music than you could possibly grasp. fuck. by your standands, rise to remains must be shit too because they're "vocals sound whiny". well news for you lemmings, that's bruce dickinson's son. i'd love to see your self employed blog site disrespect them. only spend an hour doing it and i bet THOUSANDS ACROSS THE "WORLD" would surely agree with you. hell, since when the fuck did africa and egypt have access to shitty blog sites? oh well so much for the world.. also, if the world population is 6.7 billion, i'm sure the other 6.7 wouldn't give a fuck about your ignorant ass.
ReplyDeleteYou're a false for liking BFMV. Get over it. Go join the plethora of other falses and do whatever falses do (like listen to false music).
ReplyDeleteHaha what? Because a band has Bruce Dickinson's son, they are immune to criticism? Rise to Remain do suck balls, and namedropping a couple of guitarists doesn't change how much Trivium and BFMV blow chodes.
ReplyDeleteI'm not even sure why InfidelAmsterdam is being used as an example against my theory, when he's clearly an advocate for it. He rejected a lucrative deal to become a Youtube partner, just because he didn't want his videos to be clogged up by shitty advertising. Reducing possible sources of income, that's Alter 1 in action right there.
ReplyDeletePeople my age all seem to act so fucking hurt when their shitty scene bands are told off. I have to put up with Eshays telling me i'm emo all the time, and the ones who are seem to hate being reminded of it..
ReplyDeleteHe didn't reject the deal because it meant making less money like your actual post said you should do as a metalhead. He doesn't care about money from youtube. He rejected it because he wouldn't be able to use any of the music, videos or pictures he likes using in his videos if he was a partner, which would totally ruin the videos. He making them for his subscribers, not for money. If he was what you consider a "trv kvlt metalhead", he would have shot it down even if he could have kept making videos the way he wanted and nothing would have changed just based on the fact that he would have been making money for it. Plus, he wouldn't make videos in the first place because he's supposed to be poor and lazy and not put any effort into anything. If that was true, he wouldn't even own a high quality video camera (he owns two) or a decent computer, or own so many animals. Your theory and your argument are both flawed. I don't think you understood what I meant when I was referencing Infidel. Plus, he's not poor at all. I messaged him one time on youtube saying "Plastering must pay a lot considering you can afford all the sweet and pricy decorations and shit like swords and giant skeleton chandeliers and all those albums and the merchandise and video camera blah blah." He then messaged back saying "Indeed it does. It pays more than you would think." So, all that being said, I don't understand why everyone is having such a hard time understanding all my arguments.
ReplyDeleteSome people just don't get it.
ReplyDeletesat·ire/ˈsaˌtī(ə)r/Noun
ReplyDelete1. The use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.
The fat dude who likes BMTH thinks Egypt is not included in Africa. He also thinks they don't have internet access.
ReplyDeleteThis is some good shit and all, but I think it's time to call in the BCSI: Butthurt crime scene investigators.
ReplyDeleteWhat has been seen cannot be unseen.....my personal favorite is the "they're way more popular than you'll ever be!! They'll make more money in a week than you will in your lifetime!"
ReplyDeleteAhem...they'll also make more money than the troll will make in its lifetime, also using those criteria is totally fucking weak and unmetal.
Anthrax posted the classic "wasting your time on some internet forum with losers" while he himself has written several essays on said forum with said losers...............also Anthrax has sucked balls for a long time, how you like them apples?
ReplyDeleteI like "speaker"'s blog....It's got loads of posts...http://abespieceofmind.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeleteHey kingcaras, you don't even make any sense. Why don't you learn English before you try to insult me you fucking dumb ass. I can't even understand what you're trying too say, all I see is sucking balls for a long time. How long have you been sucking balls for? Whose balls? Do you really enjoy it? Is that why you've been sucking for so long? lolololloloooooooooooololllool
ReplyDeleteKingcarcas is making perfect sense, and the only one having difficulty understanding him is you. Thus supporting (once again) my claim that you, Anthraxfan, are an idiot.
ReplyDelete@Anthraxfan That reply for kingcaras is genuinly a butthurt response. You don't need to be smart to understand that he completely owned you and as a result you started to use "lol" at the end on your reply.
ReplyDeletePathetic!
sigh
ReplyDeletei think this wank is over exaggerating, "THOUSANDS OF FANS!!!11!".. might wanna find a more realistic term of describing 1200 people, asshat.
ReplyDeleteI would leave the thinking to the people who know how to do it. Not everybody that reads this blog has a Facebook account or likes it on Facebook, cumrag. Ever think of that? I need to think of a more realistic term to describe how fucking retarded you are.
ReplyDeleteDid anyone notice that in the picture of Umad pussy? and Matt Heafy that he has an "x" on his hand? That explains why he is so worked up, because he's straight edge. P.S. I know it isn't an actual picture of him.
ReplyDeleteUstupid: You're right, because nobody in Africa has internet access. They all still live in huts, wear loin cloths and chuck spears at lions. You want to talk about fucking dense. That's really besides the point though. Apparently to you, I'm not allowed to use the term "across the world" unless my blog has specifically been viewed by every country on the planet. I can assure you that is not what the term specifically applies to, and is used in similar circumstances by other people all the time who are much smarter than you are. The fact of the matter is, along with the US and Canada, I have regular readers from Germany,the UK, Australia, the Netherlands, Sweden, Finland, Japan, Italy, Romania, Mexico, Brazil, and yeah, some others. Since I didn't list 240 geopolitical entities, I guess that isn't enough to satisfy you. Sorry.
ReplyDeleteExcuse me while I try and go "possibly grasp" some Allan Holdsworth. Congratulations on your ability to listen to music that's difficult to play, so you can pretend to appreciate it so you can feel/look smart. You must be a modern day listening virtuoso. Rise to Remain, in reference to what I told you earlier, is yet another chirpy riff playing cookie cutter "scream the verse, croon the chorus" buttcore band. They sound like shit, that's all that matters. Deal with it. Fuck who's in it and fuck who's daddy is who. Apparently if you ride the coat-tails of your old man's success, it means you're a superior person, right? Clearly in regards to your intelligence, there are chambers of your brain that are just failing to open. You look like a fucking fool, you're way out of your element, and owning you on everything you say is so easy, I feel pathetic for continuing to do it.
Thanks for continuously visiting my "shitty blog site". The majority of 6.7 billion certainly don't give a fuck about what I write, but you definitely do. See you again tomorrow. I appreciate the hits.
Ustupid might not be here tomorrow - he might lose internet access after all the medical bills he's gonna have to pay for them to fix the rectal trauma you just inflicted, Brenocide.
ReplyDeleteAlternatively, his arguments are so full of holes and violations that he may just be a really good troll.
ReplyDelete@Anthraxfan: Just stop. You probably don't understand sentence fluency or how to properly start a series of repetitious,stupid, questions together without leading it in with, "Let me ask you something Kingcarcas;" and follow it with a semi-colon. Eat me.
ReplyDeleteIt's funny how all these kids defend BVB, BFMV, Trivium, etc... I myself started out with Metal with: MM, ETF, BFMV, BMTH, etc. Then; I stopped. Crap music= crap music. I then moved on to much greater acts (Europe!) such as Amon Amarth, Ensiferum, Eluveitie, etc. They're so real Metal. I have NEVER heard of BVB until about a month ago, I listened to the song from a post on here. All I want to say is: WTF is he on?
ReplyDeleteAll you kids who think Metalcore, Deathcore and anything ELSE with core in it can just leave this planet. ANYTHING WITH CORE IN IT SUCKS. Get over it. Brenocide, you're a real metalhead. All those kids that told you stuff are just shit and sadly, I have to grow up in a time where people still can't spell right. Europe is the greatest producer of real Metal, the only band I like from America? Agalloch. That's it, nothing else; they just sound awesome (to sleep to, unless AA blasts in my ears).
Poseurs, please listen to some TMR, it will fix your problem of understanding real music. Thanks.
dont care if im metal and dont even care for metal much anymore i listen to good pop music thats in the charts, i finally realized things about myself i want to keep clean cut and presentable. as for metal that i want to make, when i become a musician there will be no headbanging, horns or moshpits and only ribena or filtered cold water will be for sale not whiskey. what we need is to make metal less rebellious and more respectable, lets lose the angry attitude, lose the guages and take a "nicer" approach to metal music.
ReplyDeleteInfidelAmsterdam is a metalhead and all but he fucking sucks
ReplyDeleteHe said Limp Bizkit and Nu Metal is real Heavy Metal
What's a "Snot Metal"?
ReplyDelete