Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Heaping Helping of Failure for the "Metal Club"

Oh my god.

Where the hell was Metal Club when I was in High School? You better believe I would have been president, and I would have thrown everyone out except me, for the sole purpose of avoiding retarded nonsense like this ever happening. You can guarantee that none of these queefs would have even been handed an application to my metal club, let alone been accepted.

This is what metal without rules looks like. It looks like a tribal flame button-up shirt circa 2002. Why are big stupid Hot Topic bondage pants the official stage garb of the Kr MCC Metal Club? Do the guys on stage have to be there in the back fake moshing because they didn't bring a dumb enough outfit? If all these kids are supposedly metal fans, why isn't there a single one out of the bunch that didn't realize that this was the worst idea possible? I have nothing but questions about what's going on here it seems, much like these young, unfortunate viewers at Fairwood Elementary.

I think Metal is kind of hard to play when you don't have the one instrument that defines it. 


  1. Oh, my, fucking, satan.
    What the fuck did I just see and why?
    This is not metal ffs, this is little kids posing as such.
    This should be illegal, and the worst part is that "what has been seen cannot be unseen".

  2. ... the fuck?

  3. WTF is this jack off doing smiling on stage or that girl wearing fishnets (yes I saw you chick about to develop an eating disorder in the the back, you can't hide). This is when I sympathize with those crazy moms who drown their children after 10 years. Metal parents, beat your kids if they do this shit, please.

  4. With metal, anything is possible.

  5. I thought most breakdowns were bad, but now I've seen the epitome of shitty breakdown...

  6. The kid's faces are priceless. They're all like "What the fuck?

  7. Uuuh.
    I must admit, on the first seconds, I laugued due to the absurdity of this.
    But then...

  8. OMG where is Al Qaeda when you need um????


All readers that post under the name "Anonymous" and are too frail and weak to represent themselves properly with a title, shall be deemed false metal poseurs for the remainder of their pitiful existence.